I have always been sensitive not the kind of woman who cries at the drop of a hat but one who senses when something is going on when someone isn’t being honest or trying to hide things. I found out recently that I am one of the most rarest personality types INFJ. I am sensitive to all situations. I know things before people are ready to tell me and when I am pay attention to myself and my surroundings and the people I am involved with I know more then I care too.
I have gotten myself into bed situations because I decided to ignore my senses. I think that is why I have become a bit of a loner and have eliminated so many people from my life. It is not that I don’t like people I have found it to be some what more peaceful at this point in my life. So many people seem to have a issue with being honest and upfront and after all the betrayal and abuse I have been through I find it better for me.
I do have friends but I keep them at arms length. It has become my protective barrier to save myself the pain of I keep finding myself in.
This week has been extremely difficult and no matter what I do my past just doesn’t seem to want to leave me alone. Reminding me of bad decisions and that I have not only put myself through but my children. It has lead me to not trust and send my super sensitive personality on high alert. It doesn’t mean it is right but it is what it is. I am still working with my counselor to work through my past and trust issues but it is not a easy process.
I can’t become nonsensitive or tone it down. I feel to much and share to little. I think that is why I have my animals. They don’t betray me or hurt me. My horses, dogs and cats are always there when others have hurt me.